28 August

I'm losing my direction.

The way I feel now, is not the same.

I'm so insecure.

Nobody holds me when I'm falling apart.

Someone does everything wrongly.

Someone just sees what is right.

Someone like me don't know anymore.

It's like whole world against me.

I wanna shout it out but I'm not sure that I can.

This world is truly not created for me.

I just wanna leave.

I just wanna run away.

I just wanna disappear.

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6 July 2013

I'm home!

Went to yewen's house for study group but we ended up with watching movie.

Then headed to tuition.

Afterthat, maning fetch us to giant and we had dinner.

McD then, and went to fetch xinmin and aiween.

Jesus, the driver today was crazy and she drove fast.

Really fast.

A speed that a beginner shouldn't have.

We went to yewen's place again.

And again for study group.

Again, we ended up with discussing Her love-life.

I was angry when I heard them telling me those unacceptable incident.

I felt unfair for my friend.

I felt like punching the slut on face.

Then, we convinced Her to let us text Him and make things clear.

She fetched me home, so I was the text-er.

I felt stressed.

Lol.

I asked her what to do if she wanna cry because she stays in the same room with sisters.

She said she won't cry, she can stand it.

I was glad to hear that.

I know she is strong.

Then I just texted that guy and I did say what I think She should say to Him.

Happy ending then. ^^

I wish that They can be together happily without problems.

Wish Them good luck and be sweet.

=)

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1 July

It's the first day of July and it sucks.
It was fine and okay at school but it's not fine right after school.
Mother kept talking about family problems.

Felt depressed and it was bad as recently I was really depressed.
Crying everyday.
I was hoping that the first day of July could make a different.
Unfortunately, it's still the same.

I'm facing all kind of troubles.
When depression comes, every little bad things are magnified.
I feel like everything that happened is pushing me to the edge.
Sometimes I just feel like dying.
I don't really deserve those right?
I mean
I love my family.
I love my friends.
I love my boyfriend.
I never do bad things.
But why does everything keep pushing me this way?
Why the hell am I getting hurt so much.
It's enough.
I don't want a life like this.
I am only 17.
I should be worrying my examinations.
I should be chilling with my friends.
I should be dating with my boyfriend.
Why am I so suffering and crying everyday?
I had done it years ago.
It shouldn't be happening right now.
It's a hard day.
It have always been hard days.
It has always been a hard life.
What should I do?
I'm falling apart.
I'm just tired of getting hurt.
I'm just sick of those crying nights.

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